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| I got to see Tracy at Corner Bakery the other day - it was so nice to see her again, it brought back so many good memories. I wish that I were better at keeping in touch with people - but I let so many people that I truely care about fall through the cracks of my nothing life.
The most depressing thought is that these people that I have cherrished may think that my lack of contact is because of an apathy on my part - it couldn't be farther from the truth. If anything I lose contact because I want to remember a friendship at its peak, I feel like a clean break is better then the dwindle that will come over the years - the pointless fights, the bickering that will ensue....just because we both know that it won't be quite like it was ever again.
As it is, I know that if I were to see any of my great friends again (with one or two exceptions, mostly starting in elementry school and steming from my anti-social tendencies back then) we would immedietly be glad to see each other, and would welcome each other back into our lives given the oppurtunity. Its a great comfort to know that whenever I truely need a friend, I honestly feel like one is just a phone call away.
We never forget the people we love.
I downloaded Anne of Green Gables and Anne of Avonlea, both movies that I grew up watching with my grandmother, multiple times. I remember spending whole days sitting with her, watching Anne grow up through the 4 hours of video tape.
Not to mention growing up reading all of the L.M. Montgomery books - arguring with Meghan Geherity or Marie as to which book was the best (Anne of the Island - no question) or which ones just didn't quite live up to the rest.
good times. | | |
| Things have a way of not working out the way I wish.
Margaret wanted to visit me, but called after she was 20 minutes down a road that would put her 3 hours out of her way to come to MoCo.
I want a summer fling and get asked out by a teenage father.
I don't want to look as experienced as I am - and as a result am often taken as much more innocent then I have ever been.
Countless hangouts, many fights, a job, money, drugs, a party or two - and at this point I can only say that this summer hasn't been too bad. I could hope for more, but I probably expected alot less.
I head back up to NB in a little less then two weeks - and i'm kinda sad to go. My summer is just getting started here, but I'll be back on weekends and for all of August.
Not to mention that I'll have the house to myself for a couple days before I go : can anyone say "I'm never hosting a party again after New Years"?
No?
Neither can I. | | |
| I can't even begin to explain how I feel about home...its so incredably complicated. A true 'love-hate' relationship.
It doesn't help that I feel massively unattractive everytime I'm home.
I suppose that it does help that some of the people that I have cared the most about for the most about of time are here. | | |
| Of course I would be the one to get caught up in online survey's again. Its not my fault - I'm just procrastinating studying for finals...
MY AUTOBIOGRAPHY
Prologue:
Where did you take your default pic?
Mike Brady's room - completely trashed. lol.
What exactly are you wearing right now?
jeans, my (default) boots and a grey wife beater
What is your current problem?
finals and summer classes
What makes you most happy?
just...being around chill people
If you could go back in time and change something would you?
a couple things. but it would probably turn things out for the worst anyway.
Name something obvious about you:
I'm shy around new people.
Name something that people might not know about you:
Once I get to know you, I'm very talkative
Name a song your listening to:
In The Waiting Line
Any celeb you would marry?
Matt Damon - unfortunatly, I'm too late
Name someone with the same birthday as you?
Thanksgiving...on occasion.
Do you have a crush on someone?
I might as well. Its truely a crush though, to come and go as I please. (i know that its a bad idea too - it has all of the undertones of a stupid jessica high school crush - something I'll never do anything about, but might just eat away at me forever)
Ever sang in front of a large audience?
I was in the elementry school choir - before I realized how bad my voice is.
What do you usually order from Starbucks?
Double tall skim caramel macciato (sp?)
Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity? Who?
Christina Ricci.
Do you still watch kiddy movies or kiddie TV shows?
not really. I'll watch old-school Sabrina if i see it on, otherwise I'd rather remember what I loved then actually watch it again.
Do you speak any other languages?
not a bit.
What magazines do you read?
Cosmo, Vouge, whatever the hell is on the magazine rack.
Have you ever ridden in a Hummer limo?
no
Has anyone you've been really close with passed away?
not really, no.
Do you ever watch MTV?
Parental Control? Common what stoner hasn't watched that show?
What's something that really annoys you?
Fat girls in too little clothes.
Chapter 1:
Middle name:
Ruskin
Nickname(s):
Jessi (Jess at home)
Current location:
Rutgers the State University of New Jersey, Clothier Dorm
Eye color:
Hazel
Chapter 2:
Do you live with your parents:
Over the summer I will - when i'm not in new brunswick that is.
Do you have any siblings:
A sister and a brother (both younger)
Chapter 3: Favorites
Ice cream flavor:
Starbucks Cappichino Chip
Shampoo/conditioner:
Redkin Color Guard
Sing in the shower:
Only at home when no one else is in the house
Write on your hand:
rarely
Call people back:
I never call people period - they call me 
Believe in love:
If it makes me hopeful, I'll believe in anything.
Sleep on a certain side of the bed:
It all depends on my mood.
Wear glasses or contacts:
...sunglasses?
Have any bad habits:
Who doesn't?
chapter 4?
Apparently Chapter 4 is useless
Chapter 5:
Have You Ever...
Worn braces:
For a year and a half
Broken a bone:
My baby toe when I was 12
Had stitches:
Only when I had my wisdom teeth out
Taken painkillers:
Of course.
Gone SCUBA diving:
I want to.
Been stung by a bee:
Only a wasp - and only once (well...more if you count the insect. lol)
Slept with your contacts in overnight:
i don't have contacts.
Thrown up in a restaurant:
yeah.
Been to overnight camp:
Academic overnight camp, lol.
Sworn in front of your parents:
I really try not to.
Had detention:
only once, for skipping class.
Been called a bitch:
Countless times
Been called a hoe:
i'm sure someone has
Been called a stank-ass mongoloid elf-tit lookin' sonofabitch?
Can't say that I have...
Chaper 6:
Who/What was the last...
Person to IM you?
Aaron
Person you kissed:
I honestly couldn't tell you
Person to call you:
Margaret, I guess
Person you hugged:
Schwaiger...or Greg
Person you tackled:
I can't remember
Thing you touched:
other then the keyboard?
Thing you ate:
a cup of noodles
Thing you drank:
the water from the cup of noodles...
Thing you said:
Fuck NJ Books - take it down! | | |
| The school year is slowly (or quickly - depending on how you look at it i guess) coming to an end. And it scares me.
For one thing, what if I don't do as well as I think I will? Rutgers has been screwing me at every corner since I've gotten back - I wouldn't hold it above the professor to count how many abscences I have and fail me because I missed 2 classes instead of 1.
I guess I'll just have to work my hardest and have faith that not everyone is out to get me this week, lol. Though sometimes thats hard to imagine  .
I went to a frat this weekend, and I ended up dancing the whole night with a 29 year old friend of margarets older brother. I had no idea that he was practically 30, and it makes me happy that I told him that I really didn't need help walking up to my room, lol.
The night before me, margaret, dana, abe and mike brady all got drunk together (and then got sick together haha) and took loads of drunked pictures. Go to my photobucket to see them. (http://photobucket.com/albums/v234/with_the_band/ - go to 'friends and so forth')
What am I going to do over summer break w/o all of my partying friends?!?! lol | | |
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